Day Two- How tell to Family and Friends* December & January 2011

With the passing of days, you feel the day you were diagnosed was a thousand years ... remember the doctor and he told you as trying to explain everything, and although his words are in Spanish and trying desperately to understand each expressing things, only assimilate so like a dead language that no one hears a thousand, where medical concepts, calculations, statistics, probability, become a whirlwind, a mixture indesifrable of nonsense words, all you conclude in your infinite ignorance is that from now on you will not be the same, never again, they'll have a go with your host indefinitely, with whom he will have to fight and win.

Each day that passes you are trying to lessen the impact thinking it was some mistake, that crossed the papers, which are not yours, that this is not your name on every paper, every consideration, that this will not going any way to you, it occurs to you ....... but also a very strong part of you tells you that it is, the sheath is as it is and that we must face it with full force.

Since you know or think you know that you face, desperately looking for reassembling the pieces that were scattered ... for moments, hours, days shall be watered everywhere .. every step you find a hand, a memory, a desire. and then you face one of the strongest things! start downloading you have to carry you alone for days with people who are with you, who loves you, your family, your friends, who is in your heart.

And then begin to drop the words carefully, you run into people, talk to you, support you, caress you, everyone wants to know and confirm the suspicion and hear nothing happens, try to control what you say, want to sound soft, does not impact too, but once you know what that's unreal, like not going to impact as it will not hurt, you ask within yourself, you pray for anyone to cry in front of you because maybe they do feel that if you pierce the heart in the act ... concealed with all your strength, hold your breath, try to escape and find time to mourn ......... but no tears come.

You're a sponge ready to receive everything, fondling all the words, the hugs of strength and support, you see how every day is being transformed more and more pain in force, in positivism frustration, anger in love and like faith and prayer of all, the great chain of positive energy surrounds you from head to toe and hope desperately that you do not release ...